Despite it's Pre-K appeal, there's something timeless and heartwarming about Sesame Street that always makes a nostalgic trip down memory lane worthwhile.
Sometime in the mid-to-late 90s, Children's Television Workshop decided to shift the focus of attention away from an ensemble cast of human performers and various Muppets to the red-felt money machine. Elmo was marketable, and that's it. That's all that mattered. It doesn't even matter his puppeteer and voice actor was accused with multiple accusations of pederasty. Elmo was staying. Elmo was untouchable. Elmo was invincible and eternal.
And that's a shame. Because the simple, kid-focused humor and writing has the spectacular ability to reach adults as well. But the music. By god the music. That's in a class all of its own. Sesame Street has an army of 20, 30 and even 40 year-olds singing infectious ditties by the score (pun intended).
Let's count down ten songs I personally remember, and examine why they were (and continue to be) so great.
10)Telephone Rock
What questions did I ask as a kid? What is a telephone booth? Why does the phone have a dial instead of buttons? What is an operator? Nope. I wanted to know why the background singers were cavemen.
Look at them. They look like cavemen! Shaggy hair, furry clothing, saber tooth necklace. I'm not wrong about this.
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| ELMO SAYS: PLAYSKOOL ELMO PHONE AVAILABLE AT ALL MAJOR RETAILERS FOR $9.99 |
9) The Word is No
This one's a product of its era, parodying avant-garde music videos of the time, including Talking Head's And She Was and Peter Gabriel's Sledgehammer. I think somebody at CTW learned how to change the frame rate of their camera, and then pitched the idea in a flurry of excitement.
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| ELMO SAYS: SOMEONE ONCE TELL ELMO 'NO, ELMO CANNOT HAVE THIRTY MINUTES DEDICATED SCREENTIME.' IT WAS LAST THING HE SAY. |
8) You're Alive
For several years, I believed trees and plants were not alive because of this song. Misleading! That'll teach me to trust a Muppet that looks like Sammy Hagar.
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| ELMO SAYS: EVERYTHING ALIVE IN ELMO'S WORLD. CRAYONS ARE ALIVE. TV ALIVE. TOYS ALIVE. GOOD LESSON FOR KIDS. |
7) Put Down the Duckie
Try explaining to a child of three who Andrea Martin or Wynton Marsalis are. Hell, I still don't recognize half these people.
Also, total whiplash switching instantly from Pee-Wee Herman to Ladysmith Black Mambazo.
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| ELMO SAYS: HEY, THAT'S PAUL REUBENS! ELMO'S FRIEND KEVIN CLASH SEES LOTS OF MOVIES WITH PAUL REUBENS! |
6) Healthy Food
Yup. That's Frank Oz rapping. The 90s were weird.
This is why the "Sometimes Food" controversy was such malarkey.
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| ELMO SAYS: ELMO GONNA HAVE TO POP A CAP IN COOKIE'S ASS. WEST SIDE, BITCH! |
5) Dance Myself to Sleep
Bert and Ernie's relationship is hotly debated. Being forced to share my bedroom with a younger brother for many years, I was convinced Bert and Ernie were siblings. With parents who were never seen.
This is why the common urban legend of the duo being gay lovers never sits well with me.
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| ELMO SAYS: ELMO START THAT URBAN LEGEND. ELMO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF BIGOTED RED STATE VALUES TO ELIMINATE RIVALS. IT WORK FOR GOP. |
4) Somebody Come and Play
I always remember this song being slower. And acoustic. And performed in a minor key. And I thought Bob McGrath sang it...
Memory's a tragic thing.
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| ELMO SAYS: MR NOODLES IS DOING PRATFALLS! NOW I'M TALKING TO A GOLDFISH! NOW I'M COLORING! NOW I'M TALKING TO THE GOLDFISH AGAIN! |
3) Mary Had a Bicycle
Don Music: World's best or world's worst plagiarist?
My family inherited a piano when I was six. Guess what running gag I repeatedly re-enacted.
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| ELMO SAYS: ELMO ELMO ELMO ELMO ELMO. ELMO ELMO ELMO ELMO? ELMO ELMO ELMO. ELMO. |
2) Do De Rubber Duck
Sesame Street invented the foam party. With a bathtub that big, it was inevitable.
They are all wearing swim trunks. I will hear no other arguments.
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| ELMO SAYS: ELMO FORCED TO SING IN BACKGROUND WHILE F#@%ING GUY SMILEY GETS A SOLO? GUY SMILEY GONNA HAVE ACCIDENT COMING INTO WORK TOMORROW. |
1) Monster in the Mirror
Let's play 'Name That Early-90s Celebrity!'
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| ELMO SAYS: The law firm of Hooper and Hooper represents the Public Broadcasting Station and Children's Television Workshop. If you are
represented by legal counsel, please direct this letter to your attorney
immediately and have your attorney notify us of such representation.
You are hereby directed to:
CEASE AND DESIST ALL DEFAMATION OF
COPYRIGHTED CHARACTERS AND REPUTATIONS. |
For a thorough explanation on why Elmo is terrible, read this.
